Poem – “Shock”

eyes

 

Shock // by Jennifer Patino

 

Will you plug this in for me?
An electric hum muffles your reply,
a distracting symphony.
What of madness and
feminine energy? Your labels
and judgments have over-
affected me.

A spark of synchronicity,
underlying electricity,
lightning in a heart-shaped
bottle, empty. Shattered
chartreuse sea-glass
tossed into tourmaline infinity.

The stars shine for me.
I notice them when they fall,
when they’re escaping, when
they’re free.

They say their way is a cure
for me. I turn a blind eye
to conformity,
and then I finally see
there is no such thing as
finality, when things
change, in a flash, so
quickly.

I’m powered on
under a fog, discreetly.
In one flick of a switch,
I’ll be transformed completely.

 

 

Poem – “Mix It Up”

partyedit

 

Mix It Up // by Jennifer Patino

 

he said something about

mixing alcohol and antibiotics

and how it might not be a good idea,

 

so she counts pills

like counting how many ways

she can fuck her day up

 

there’s enough sweetness there

to put you into a diabetic coma

and a sea of glass and hard liquor surrounds you

as you drown

 

life is hard,

so death must be easy, right?

think about it:

you close your eyes and then open them again

 

how bad can it be?

 

the stores close way too early

and everyone’s asleep

but you

 

how lonely it is out on that limb

of knowing way too much,

yet knowing nothing at all

 

she says “forget it“,

and has another drink

 

she smiles thinking,

give me something to live for

 

– October 28, 2007

 

Note: I said I would share some old work I was going through so here’s a little poem. I remember I wrote this while I was recovering from a kidney infection, interlaced with snippets of scenes & conversation from a party. I find I like the writing of my twenties best when it doesn’t rhyme (I seriously rhymed waaaay too much back in the day, and pretty badly I feel), & the weirder the poem, the better. I didn’t have nearly as many insecurities as I do now about writing or anything really. Which is probably strange because as you get older you’re probably supposed to care less about what other people think about you, right? Hmm. Circumstances. Anyway, hope you enjoy a glimpse of my memory lane.

 

 

Poem – “Fuel”

FuelPhoto by Me

 

Fuel // by Jennifer Patino

 

I down
a cup
of jitterbugs
& shovel
handfuls
of knowledge up

I will it
to inspire me
& I give in
to ink tangents
and the fire

I make
miracles
out of messes
& destroy
that which
doesn’t serve

I believe
that purity
of divine love
is the truth
of what we
really deserve

I do this
to stay alive
& enjoy the lessons
I’m given;
It’s all I know
about how to survive

 

 

Poem – “Skating By”

pkd

 

Skating By // by Jennifer Patino

 

I understand the fragility
of life

I know the tides change
quickly

                                                        in a blink

I know a small blip
in my blueprint
caused all this

I can’t say
I blame the organs

I can’t say they’ve failed me

                                                       not yet, thank God

I understand separation
from the body

                                                        out of the mind

I tell them all
in my head
is a sanctum
and if I can get there,

                                                         if they let me

I can know relief,
however brief

I can trust the thin ice
to hold me

just a little longer

as I convince them all
I’m growing stronger

 

 

Poem – “Aching”

20171120_034629_Film7Photo by Me

 

Aching // by Jennifer Patino

 

Savoring the crumblings,
dust painting,
rubble wreckage treasure–
creating

Building blocks from
disaster sites,
this is your whole life–
the making

Being the glue,
the binding,
keeping it together–
bending and breaking

A mother sobbing,
breathing aftermath air,
surviving it all–
Earth’s quaking

 

 

 

3 Micropoems – “Seized, Transitions”

TransitionsPhoto – “Transitions” by Me

 

Seized, Transitions // by Jennifer Patino

 

To the chair, bound
To the floor, fallen

Electric eels swim
Below my surface

Short circuiting
My glitching system

 

*

 

I tripped

     Razor wire

Trembling legs

A step is an accomplishment

     (or a trap)

Clawing the wall, the skin,
the lit fuse,

                h  a  y  w  i  r  e

The brain interprets
& it’s all wrong

It implodes

Sparks dance
inside my head

I’m half dead

 

*

 

This coming winter
I will feign a freeze
I will spend time within
My heart storage space

By an imagined first frost
I will have thawed out
the old wounds
For a renewed healing

 

Thanks to @TastyPoem and @TLPoetry for prompts.

 

Poem – “Alaska”

tiles

 

Alaska // by Jennifer Patino

 

I won’t claim you or call you by name.

You were my last frontier, that’s for sure.

You were the one that didn’t even

have a chance to get away–

 

before going away

we made so many plans

I waited up for you, did you know that?

 

–You crossed a frozen pond and showed no fear.

You skated in espadrilles across sand at the run down beach.

You said it was beautiful once. I asked if you’d miss

Florida sunsets. I asked if you’d miss light. You said

you would be more sad about the return of the Sun.

I said I was a night person. You said you knew.

 

From the bar to that

one girl’s basement, to the top

of the lookout pier

 

I wrote poems for you after you told me you

couldn’t say goodbye because then you would

have never left. We talked about boyfriends.

So many boyfriends. You too? You asked if you

could put them up on your wall. (The poems

I mean.) I felt like an old fashioned idiot when

I realized they were a digital wall for all to see

and not printed and pinned above your bed

or better yet, copied and written down on stationary

in your loopy script. I only know your handwriting

because you signed my yearbook. I wish

I had a letter from you. I hear you say

I miss you” in that whispery way you said

you have soft lips” after the photo shoot.

Of course I can’t hear you. We have yet

to exchange new numbers. (We never will.)

I just have a gift for hearing texts as if they

are characters of my favorite book in my head.

 

Magenta type comic sans,

too bright, and this is the pre-emoji

era so I was in less than three with you but you never knew

 

You started modeling. Pin up poses. Pixie princess.

Peasant skirts. Exposed tan belly. I pictured you

in a frozen castle faraway and there you were

in the sunshine again. In the forest again.

In a dark bar again, hiding from the crowd

in the corner, but this time you’re with someone else.

I told no one I missed you. I forgot about the poems.

The most beautiful things anyone has ever

written for me.” You said. We didn’t talk much

after that. It’s your fault. You displayed us. You

exposed us. You made them look at those

photos a little more closely every time they came up.

You made me re-think Truth or Dare. You disappeared.

 

Do you ever think about

Aurora Borealis and how

her aura looked just like them?