Unsolicited // by Jennifer Patino
You can’t get down
about everything that’s happening
all at once and all the time
I can and I do. I become acquainted with pillows. I’m labeled lazy. A friend of mine says laziness is fear. I say she’s right. I say I can’t help that I’m terrified. I can’t turn my wide eye toward
anything other than the tragedy. I feel helpless searching for a remedy. My shoulders ache. It means there will be an earthquake.
You can’t let yourself
become wrapped up in all of that
It’s no good for you
I make laundry lists of what’s good. What I love. A friend of mine encourages this practice and I say she’s right. Gratitude gets me through the day. Darkness gets me through the night. The storm has knocked out all the light. I find a mystical way. There is a beyond I live daily to get to. I can glimpse it
if I really try hard to.
You should try,
you should try,
you should try
I am given new lists of suggestions. It’s a transition season so my chest is full of congestion. The city doesn’t help. It’s too big, and too crowded. Behind blackout curtains I choose to be entombed. I am enshrouded. I cough and apologize. You say it’s okay and I roll my eyes. I love you. Please know this. I can’t more clearly explain this.
I’m going to let you go,
okay, you get your rest
Take it easy
Yes. Yes. What you say is best.
What you say sounds so easy.
My arms are heavy so I fall
asleep with the device version of you
like a block of ice on my chest.